BREAKING: Heaven Announces Immediate Rhinestone Shortage as Dolly Parton Arrives at 80
Country music loses its queen, heaven gains a headliner, and somewhere Jolene has wisely turned off her phone. NASHVILLE, TN — The […]
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La Elección Se Hizo Mal… Pero Al Parecer “Mal” Ya Tiene Plaza Permanente
🌮 TL;DR PARA AVENAL El tribunal reconoció problemas importantes en cómo el Condado manejó el proceso del recall. Pero la elección queda […]
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The Election Was Done Wrong, But Apparently Wrong Has Tenure Now
TL;DR The court recognized serious problems with how Kings County handled Avenal’s recall process: the City Clerk was the lawful official, there […]
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BREAKING: Avenal’s One-Man Quorum Somehow Escapes Raid Despite Ongoing War on Mathematics
AvenalPress.com asks the obvious question: if we’re raiding people over alleged wrongdoing, when does the search warrant arrive for the meeting where […]
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⚖️ TENTATIVE RULING: THE COUNTY DID IT WRONG… SO IT COUNTS? 🤡
Only in government can you apparently get this result: The County illegally started Avenal’s recall process without the City’s authorization. But since […]
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⚖️ FALLO TENTATIVO: EL CONDADO LO HIZO MAL… ¿ASÍ QUE CUENTA? 🤡
Solo en el gobierno puedes terminar con algo así: El Condado ilegalmente hizo el proceso de destitución de Avenal sin la autorización […]
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🚨 ÚLTIMA HORA: El Recall Gana, Avenal Paga la Cuenta — y el Departamento de Bomberos Sigue Aquí
Después de más de $67,000, demandas, guerra política y suficiente drama de Facebook como para considerarlo un servicio público municipal, Avenal finalmente […]
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🚨 BREAKING: Recall Wins, Avenal Gets the Bill — and the Fire Department Is Still Here
After $67,000+, lawsuits, political warfare and enough Facebook drama to qualify as a municipal utility, Avenal has finally achieved the dream: fewer […]
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BREAKING: Kings County Discovers Mutual Aid Apparently Means “Everybody Helps Everybody — Except Avenal”
Chief Chamberlin reportedly guarding the mutual-aid gate like it contains the last Costco rotisserie chicken in California. TL;DR — For Everyone Who […]
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BREAKING: Avenal Holds Its Breath While Court Decides Whether Recall Was an Election or an Expensive Group Project
Whatever the judge decides, residents are advised that Tuesday will still arrive on schedule. AVENAL, CA — The City of Avenal is […]
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